chickenfeet: (thatcher)
Seen on Twitter this morning and too good not to pass on:

A banker, a teacher, a Tory MP and a Daily Mail reader are sitting around a table.  There are ten biscuits on a plate on the table.  The banker scoffs nine of the biscuits.  The Tory MP turns to the Daily Mail reader and says "Watch out for that teacher, she's trying to pinch your biscuit".
chickenfeet: (cute)
A few mathematics jokes:

Q: What is the difference between a mathematician and a philosopher?
A: The mathematician only needs paper, pencil, and a trash bin for his work - the philosopher can do without the trash bin...

Q: What is a mathematician's pick when faced with the choice between poutine and eternal bliss in the afterlife?
A: Poutine! Because nothing is better than eternal bliss in the afterlife, and poutine is better than nothing.

Q: What is the difference between a Ph.D. in mathematics and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four...

Q: What is purple and commutative?
A: An abelian grape...

One day, Jesus said to his disciples: "The Kingdom of Heaven is like 3x squared plus 8x minus 9."
A man who had just joined the disciples looked very confused and asked Peter: "What, on Earth, does he mean by that?"
Peter replied: "Don't worry - it's just another one of his parabolas."
chickenfeet: (Default)
One of The Onion's better efforts, I thought.

In other news, Not Quite So Skinny Kitten is lapping from a bowl of KMR-A/D mix quite happily and appears to be gaining weight.

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